mock meat

dopez: when you boys grab your crotch, do you actually grab it every time?

divo: huh?

dopez: {sigh} if you choose to respond to someone with that gesture, do you always see it through and make contact? do you or have you ever just given the illusion that you're grabbing it?

divo scratches his head, perplexed. he purses his lips as if i just asked him to throw cash money out the window. he uses a lifeline and turns to the khid

divo: you ever fake a grab, khid?

the boys faces are covered with question marks. i seemed to have cast some kind of spell over them. i see the words of my question knock about in their heads. muscle memory laces up and goes for a jog, then asks them, "body, have we ever done this (arms sweep down and in like a car to a driveway) without doing that (parking)."

khid: that's just crazy talk. shrugs shoulders

dopez: yes, what was i thinking? i wasn't, that's what! here, take my shoes and get someone to put me back in the kitchen where i belong! you come to san francisco, you ride a cable car. a boy who's hand is in the neighborhood of his junkage, well, it would just be plain rude (not to mention un'merican) to have come all that way and not stop by for a visit!

hands on hip (not dick), their faces ask me if i seriously just want the terrorists to win.

that be a big, fat loud, duh in my dopez face.